life and lust

hey baby here's a heart attack
sneak attack to your soul
hey baby here's a sneak attack
a look back to your soul
eyes that tell lies
lips the look like life
sucking on my lips
sucking my life out
is this what lust is about
finding loves whereabouts
locked secrets in my hands
pick the right one and you'll explode
implode from the satisfying way i suck
down I go, into the forest of gods
standing tall i take hold
gripping on the edge letting go
eyes rolled back and lust is formed
erupting and gushing souls
one first then the next one goes
sweat buds dripping down our backs
tongues dancing to and tho
evolution of life and love

mask

so I need to stop hiding behind this mask I've created, grow up and trap the beast replicating, burn them at the stake, stop myself from being fake. fuck the world i say, but really i want a brighter day, you see me, but don't really see....the real man behind the mask, the man hiding from his past, trying to out last the world as it burns, hoping someday the light will return, but for now here's this task, next time you ask me how I am, really ask me hows the man behind the mask.

Wealth

so one day I was just taking a little night walk and this poem popped into my head....I think it was suppose to be in a form of a rap song or some shit..idk...here it is for all you 2 readers

Theres a couple things I don't need
cars, money, and bitches
id rather be digging ditches
drive around in my Nissan sentra
read the news be all like extra extra!
whats in today's agenda
chill in bed, watch tv, jerk off
be bad ass like lara croft
dress backwards like criss cross
jump jump!
lets get naked and hump hump!
then grab my dick and pump pump!
I don't need the fancy shit in my life
nor do I need children and a wife
I'd rather be poor as fuck
as long as I get my dick sucked
theres material wealth and real wealth
you don't know the hand I've been dealt
so suck my dick and take a hint
I don't need any of your shit
All I need is myself

hotel love

Love blooms on a hotel couch

The wind whispers each others name

Eyes locked but no movement is made

Frozen in a dead zone

The silence kills the joy

Cupids arrows cannot reach its mark

The walls are too thick

It’s a cold night tonight she covers herself in a blanket

Wishing that he would be under with them

Bodies warming each other by the fireplace

Watching movies she doesn’t care about

She just wants to be near him

Wishing she could be in his arms

Wishing she could say anything

She wants him, but cautious

Trying to protect herself from cupids arrows

Trying to protect herself from love  

Jack and Jill

Jack and Jill went up the hill

Bathed in the radiance of the sun

Love is in bloom

Yet no one speaks a word

Snap snap snap goes jack’s fingers

Slap slap slap goes jill’s hand

 Two on lookers laugh in jest

 Knowing what should be

She laughs at his jokes

He looks at her with admiration

She wants to touch his hand

But is too afraid of her own plan

Afraid he might not understand

He’s as clueless as a new born baby

Not knowing what’s going on

Jack is blind to what’s in front of him

Jill wants to scream out her feelings

But her walls deafen her screams

They want to be together

But no one does anything about it

Sitting so close, yet worlds apart

No one speaks of the tension in the air

One is clueless, one denies it all

Separated by an empty space

Smile pretty girl don’t ruin your face

Look towards her dude, and look in her eyes

Break her walls down and grasp her hand

So close together, but worlds apart

sleep

I wish I could sleep better. My eyes fall but dont stay closed. my mind is racing, wont slow down. Im so tired of everything, I dont want to take a pill. Please body fall asleep. Please body work with me

Pretending

I can go back and pretend to be happy, but whats the point. everything has a beginning and an end. sometimes i fear that my happiness is coming to a crashing end. Part of me knows that's all bullshit. My happiness is just beginning with the birth of my niece and a new baby on the way. Why is it that I don't feel happier about it? I feel so comatose about this. My feelings are just ....fake. I'm wearing masks to depict different emotions. Maybe I don't know how to feel happy? Maybe I deep down don't want to feel anything but sadness. That's now how humans should feel. I don't know how else to feel.